Expiry Date of Relationships...!!

experiences just made me wonder if relationships in this world come with expiry dates..???

do relationships last only as long as the people involved have something or the other to take from each other? in fact, that brings in the question of the base of relationships on this earth. do people make relationships with others only if and when they want something from the other person? only when each has a need,a purpose, an agenda? can relationships not take place if there are no agendas involved? if the need for the relationship is just a simple social or emotional need to know people and remain known to them.

do such relationships exist? and if they do take birth, then do they last forever? well, deep thinking gives me the logical answer as a big "YES". because, this kind of a relationship is perhaps the purest form. where the people concerned are only interested in the emotional need for the relationship. but, life's incidents & experiences depict otherwise.

people today have become so selfish that the general trend is of relationships with
defined agendas. and so it lasts only as long as the the mutual agendas are satisfied. even if there happen to be people who don't have agendas while forming a relationship, others see "hidden" agendas and keep presuming or rather expecting that sometime or the other, the person is going to ask for a favour. and that is the reason he is continuing with a particular relationship.

at other times, people may not remember a particular relationship till the time they seem to "need" something from it. and then suddenly, they want to revive it, only till such time that their agenda is satisfied and then again they disappear into oblivion, only to resurface again for another agenda.such relationships that are based purely on agendas/selfish motives of getting work done, are not true relationships actually in the first place. and they do have an expiry date.

but, does that mean that any relatiopnship that takes birth in this world is looked at from this "agenda coloured eye"??

actually, the world has changed so much today, or rather people have changed, that since nobody calls anybody without any work/motive, one tends to see all relationships with a coloured eye.

The other way round too is true. people don't seem to recognize someone at certain ocasions, though ofcourse they may know the person very well. and it is pretty shocking to have people who know you well, just walk past you, as if looking through you, with not even the remotest sign of recognition. and the same people, who don't or didn't recognize you in public/at certain times, may "appear" or "pretend" to be the best of friends with you when alone or at places where nobody knows them.

and if there happen to be such "abnormal" people existing, who do recognize you and want to keep the relationship going,inspite of "no agendas", you firmly "see" a motive behind it. sadly, then you are unable to recognize the few pure relationships, ones that exist only for the sake of relationships and nothing else!!!

but ofcourse, you need to have that insight and that feeling and that "emotional intelligence" to grasp such a relationship!! and for that you also have to see it without any "filter" of any colour.
//best//mg

True Enlightenment...!!

Hi all !!
am finally back after a long time.

i don't know how many of you read the Times of India supplement "Speaking Tree". i just read the article “Unlearn to Learn” which appeared in the "Speaking Tree" of November 6, 2011.

I totally agree with this thought. In fact it is such a coincidence that I had arrived at the same concept through life’s experiences and have written about it in my book “You Connecting With ….YOU!!” (YCWY) published sometime back.
Here are some relevant quotes from my book.

“This enlightenment, what I have come to realize, is nothing but unlearning everything you learnt. Sounds stupid, isn’t it? But think deeply. And, I am no “Guru” or something trying to teach. This realization has dawned on me as a result of different incidents and happenings in life. Because to live life in the true sense, you need to unlearn all that you had learnt and what is left after that is your actual knowledge gain. So in a way enlightenment can be equated to emptiness, but one that came only after extensive learning.” (chapter 9- YCWY)

“Keep learning but a stage will come when you have to begin unlearning everything you learnt. But this does not mean that all the learning accumulated by you throughout life was a waste, because this stage of unlearning will never come if you have not learnt enough. It is as simple as you will not know what an empty glass is till you have filled it and seen what a full one means. Once it is full, you can empty it out and refill it with something else.” (epilogue- YCWY)

“Then, having made that space free, you could add your new form of learning, the higher form, where you begin to understand life better.” (epilogue- YCWY)

//best//mg